Unstoppable Me

Recently one of my kids faced a difficult situation. They were trying something new, and while they were enthusiastic about it at first, they began to be filled with fear as the day approached. I tried to convince them that everything was going to be okay but they didn’t believe me.

I sympathized with them and it broke my heart to see them want to give up. I remembered the words of my friend, “Now we are going to find out what you are made of!”

I knew if I let my kids quit it would only get harder for them to face her fears and do uncomfortable things. They needed to experience what it was like to meet something hard and push through it. If they didn’t, they’d get stuck and wouldn’t grow emotionally.

I second-guessed my decision numerous times that day but in the end I knew I made the right decision. It wasn’t easy, but my sweet child survived and is better for it.

For the full story join me over at @FaithGateway for “The Courage to Be Unstoppable”. 

Everything is Better with a Friend

My kids gave me a long list of things they want to do once school gets out.

The list included going to the zoo, the park, museums, and the beach. They would like to make crafts, host play dates, and have sleepovers with their friends. These activities all sounds fun. However, I honestly don’t look forward to most of it. At least not with just them. I know that sounds awful but let me explain.

I love spending time with my little ones. The things we do together are super fun; there is plenty of laughter, joy, and teachable moments. But being with another mom and her little ones makes everything so much more fun.

Meet me over at Faith Gateway to read more!

The Benefits of Playing Hide-and-Seek

When I was young, I loved playing Hide-and-Seek. While finding the perfect hiding spot, we'd often found objects among the trees. It was mostly stuff that people threw away, but to my friends and me these items were treasures. With each new find, we created an imaginary story about where they came from.

There are so many benefits to kids playing games like these! Join me over at Faith Gateway to READ MORE...

How You Can Embrace God’s Unique Mission for your Family

Have you ever thought, “Why doesn't my family look like hers?” Do you admire her house, her car, her incredibly talented children, or her husband’s high profile job? Are you tempted to wonder, “If I’d made different choices, would my life be better?”

It’s easy to look at the people we know and assume they have it all together. Or to envy another family’s path. But God has a unique purpose and mission for our family.

I am over at More to Be talking about how you can let go of discontent and regret and embrace God's unique mission for your family. Join me there to READ MORE!

A Few Ways You Can Touch Someone With Your Written Words

One of the things I miss most from my pre-smartphone days is getting a personal note in the mail. Even though emails are super convenient, they can not replace the feeling you get from receiving a postcard from a family member on vacation or a letter from a friend far away.

In the book, Easter Love Letters from God, kids can experience what it is like to get a letter from their Heavenly Father.

Join me other at Faith Gateway to READ MORE about this wonderful kid's book plus read about a few ways you can touch someone with your written words.

Creating a Culture of Creativity in Your Home

When my husband and I set out to write a family mission statement, the first thing we did was write down our values and passions. Our goal was to choose the top 5-7 ideals to represent who we were and incorporate them into our family culture. After much discussion, we settled on faith, integrity, generosity, excellence, love, legacy, and creativity.

Occasionally being creative is not enough to make it a part of our family culture. It must consistently show up in everything we do. This principle applies to your family values, no matter what they are.

Join me over at Faith Gateway where I am sharing some ways we make creativity a part of your life...

How What We Allow in our Home Affects our Family Culture

I received an email from my son's teacher recently. It was about his unkind behavior towards a friend. At first I was tempted to defend him and make excuses. But ultimately I realized I needed to examine our family's culture to see what I was allowing at home. 

Join me over at Faith Gateway to read the full story... 

Finding Selah - Book Review

The first time I met Kristen Kill was back in 2015 when I attended the Winsome Retreat. A few weeks before the event, my friend Elise and I got an email from the retreat’s host asking us if we could give a few fellow bloggers from NYC a ride. We immediately said yes! We didn’t know these women but were happy to make space in the minivan for them. 

On the morning we left, we pulled up to the train station to pick up the two women whose faces we’d only seen online. We found them, introduced ourselves, and after a quick Starbucks stop, we set out for the 5-hour drive. 

Kristen was one of those women. 

The car ride there was an absolute delight. We got to know each other quickly, and it didn’t take long for us to go deep into the conversation about family, faith, and work. I am forever changed by our time together that weekend. (We did it all again the following year too!)

It’s an honor to share my friend’s book with you today!

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Throughout the Psalms, we find the word Selah. It’s a break in the psalmist’s cries, to pause and reflect. It’s also an invitation to rest. And in that rest, God provides a reorientation for our soul. 

In the book Finding Selah, Kristen Kill explains what Selah is and how we can experience it in our everyday. 

Through personal stories laced with the truth of God’s love and provision, she shares her experience with depression, loss, and ultimately finding peace in the one who is rest, Jesus. 

This book challenged me to let go of control and trust in God’s provision instead of what I have created for myself; to stop gathering manna for tomorrow and instead drink in the beauty and grace I’ve been given today. I was reminded that “Rest and provision are inextricably linked. Intertwined.”

This book is easy to read, and I had to stop myself from finishing it in one sitting. Much like rest itself, this book is to be savored slow, and with intention. I will be sure to revisit it often especially in seasons where busy attempts to steal my peace. 

If you are weary, stretched beyond your limits, and long for change this book is for you!

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The Winsome Retreat hosted by Kim Hyland is taking place this year April 13-15, 2018 at White Sulphur Springs, Manns Choice, PA. Right now they are taking EARLY BIRD registrations - purchase by January 15 & SAVE $40

To read why I think Winsome is a retreat you don't want to miss click HERE.

Bearing God’s Image

Have you ever noticed, upon meeting a child for the first time, you can easily match up the “grown-up” they belong to?

Sometimes they are the spitting image of their mom or dad, and other times it’s the similarity to their parent’s mannerisms, behavior, or even dress that gives them away.  Our family is no different.

Read the rest of this post at More to Be...

May the Faith Be with You

As a child, I loved learning that God created the sun, moon, and stars on the fourth day. I was amazed to learn that a light year is the distance covered by light in a single year, which is equal to 5.88 trillion miles, and that the Milky Way is around 100,00 lights years wide.

What I learned about God and His creation as a child laid the foundation for the awe and wonder I still have for who God is. Your child can have the same footing as they dig into God’s Word with these books!

Head over to Faith Gateway to learn more about them!

I Choose to Believe - More to Be

I used to think that my value and worth by what I did (or didn’t do) for a living, how much I got done in a day, and how clean my house was. That lie made me feel less than and consequently affected the kind of woman, wife, and mother I was.

Head over to More to Be to read the story of how an experience with my oldest daughter and her swim team taught me to recognize the lies that held me back and counter them with the truth.

Helping Our Teen Daughters Find Their Own Beautiful

“Finding your own beautiful has a lot to do with deciding what kind of person you want to become.”  – Chelsea Crockett

To navigate today’s culture and make good choices my daughter will have to decide what she believes about God and His Word and determine who she wants to be. Once she does this, it will easier for her to make choices, based on her values rather than her emotions.

I am so grateful for role models such as Chelsea Crockett who share what’s it like, as a teen, to do life with Jesus. To hear more about an incredible resource for your teen join me over at Faith Gateway. 

Beyond Our Imagination: God’s Great Love

My son lost his first tooth while we were on vacation. He was thrilled. Since he has two big sisters, he knew what to expect. Since our family celebrates imagination in our kids, he couldn’t wait to go to sleep because the next morning there would be “fairy dust” on the ground and a surprise under his pillow.

Then all of a sudden his smile turned upside down and tears filled his eyes. He said, “Mommy, how is the tooth fairy going to find me?”

Join me over at Faith Gateway as I share how losing a tooth turned into the perfect opportunity to teach my son about God's omnipresence.  Read more here...

Different Kids, One God

If you are the parent of more than one child you know that no two kids are created the same.

The more I understand my kids' inherent difference, the better mom I can be to my daughters and the better relationship I can have with them.

Over the years I’ve trusted God to show me how to parent them in unique and individual ways. It’s been a process of trial and error that has deepened my reliance on God and His wisdom. He knows more about them than I do because he created them.

Join me over at Faith Gateway to read more. 

How to Find Your Squad

Life changes when you become a mom. You may have more responsibilities and get less sleep. While it's amazing in so many ways motherhood leaves you with less control over your time. And many times this can affect your friendships. 

If your friends are in different stages of life than you are, relationships may drift apart. If you leave a job to stay home with your baby or move to the burbs, friendships may disappear altogether. Sometimes being a mom keeps you so busy, you see your friends less, then you wake up one day and wonder where your people have gone. 

That’s what happened to me. Just a few years after becoming a mom I found myself lonely. I desperately wished I had a group of friends reminiscent of the crew I had in high school. A squad of moms that did things together all the time. Women to sit with at every game, school event, and fundraiser. And, if I were lucky, they’d be my weekend friends too, because our spouses would love hanging out together as much as we did.

I’d see other moms on the playground laughing and talking with other another. I assumed that everyone else had mom squad but me. I was heartbroken over the connections I no longer had and constantly complained to my husband that I didn’t have any friends. I couldn't understand why it was so hard to meet new people and have deep, meaningful relationships. 

Little did I know I wasn’t the only one that felt this way. 

Eventually, I learned a few things about friendships, and my perspective changed. I stopped hoping people would want to be around me just because we’ve met a few times and our kids went to the same school. Gone were the days of friendships that formed organically nurtured only by proximity. If I wanted friends, I had to work at it.

If you find yourself in a similar situation here’s what you can do:

1. Find your people. Think of this one like mommy dating. Go through the list of moms you want to be friends with and ask them out for coffee, invite them over for lunch, or suggest a meet up at the park. Become interested in them, ask them questions about themselves, and keep your ears open for something you have in common. You may be surprised who you connect with and who you don’t.

2. Consider the relationships you already have. What brings you together and how can you cultivate that connection? Resist the urge to chase after the people you think should be your friends only to neglect current relationships that could blossom if only nurtured.

3. Don’t put pressure on a friendship to be what it is not. Just because you love talking to another mom at pick up about your kids doesn't mean your relationship will translate into an enjoyable couples night out. And the woman you love to go to coffee with may not be a fit for your book club, tennis team, or volunteer committee. Feel free to explore different ways to connect with other women but if something doesn’t work, stick with what does.

4. Do the work. Friendships cannot be left up to chance; they require intentionality. If there isn’t already a reason to see your new mom friend regularly create one. Start a club, take a class together, or set up a weekly or monthly date to get together.

5. Connect your friends with one another. At this point, you may have a lot of individual mom friendships brewing, and that’s great. But you can take it to the next level by choosing those with similar personalities or interests and introduce them to each other. Find a reason to get them together such as drinks after a school event, brunch at your house, or a walk through your neighborhood. 

As I started to establish new friendships, I quickly learned that one mom does not fit all. That’s because relationships look a lot different than they did back in the day.  I didn't end up with a “go-to” squad as I’d hoped, but rather circles of friends that are made up of amazing women. I have my soccer mom friends, my game night couples crew, my weekend people, my book club, and my anytime you want to grab a coffee after drop off friends. These relationships mean so much more to me then I could have ever imagined.  My life is so much richer for the diversity they bring. 

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This post was originally shared on the Friending Podcast, Episode 36 How to Find Your Mom Squad

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For more on the topic listen to:

Episode 57 How To Find Your Squad

Join Elise Daly Parker, Noelle Rhodes and I as we encourage you and equip you to find your squad.

Friending - Episode 36 How to Find Your Mom Squad

How to Combat Negative Thoughts with God's Truth

I’d been known to listen to whatever thoughts popped into my head and believe them to be true. I've entertained negative thoughts about my self-worth and let my emotions breed discontent. It's not pretty, it typically makes me grumpy and impatient with others. Then insecurity sets in and it keeps me from pursuing the things I love.

Each time negative thoughts enter my mind I can choose to dwell on them or think something different. Positive thinking helps, but God’s Word and prayer are even more powerful.

Negative thoughts and emotions don’t discriminate. Both children and adults have to decide if they’ll allow them to linger in their mind.  

I'd love for you to join me over at Faith Gateway where I share my experience with overcoming negative thoughts and emotions plus an incredible resource that teaches kids how to do the same. Read More...

Cultivating Gratitude in our Families

My kids had high expectations for the summer. In the days leading up to the end of school, they came up with many ways to make the most of their school break. We made a point to follow through on those ideas. It was fun at first, but I quickly realized we set the bar too high. Excitement turned to disappointment when things didn’t go as planned. If we had nothing planned on a particular day it felt like we were not using our time well.

But, there was no way I was going to let this season play out like summers past. This year was going to be different. We were going to cultivate a habit of gratefulness instead.

Head over to Faith Gateway to read more...

Sword Wielding Cheerleaders and My Thoughts on Prayer

We are talking about prayer on the podcast this week so I thought this post from the archives was worth sharing. I used to get hung up on the "right way" pray. But then I learned God is more concerned having a relationship with us than how many minutes we pray or the exact words we use. What prayer looks like for me changes over time and looks different in each season. Here's just one example one way I pray.

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I was a cheerleader in junior high. I can remember when the opposing team had the ball we would cheer:

Let’s Go, DEFENSE Hold them! D-E-F-E-N-S-E

We would encourage the team to stay strong and prevent points from being scored against us. When the game took a turn in our favor, when we had the ball, a different cheer could be heard coming from us girls.

Score! Score! We want more! We'll drive it to the finish, And own that board!

There are many different types of prayer.  But just like those cheers, I have come to view my prayers as falling into one of two categories:

• Defensive (Lord, sustain me)
• Offensive (Lord, advance me in Your Will).

There will be times when we need to quit praying defensively take back the ball, and pray offenseively. We don’t just want to hold the line; we want progress.

 “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.”Eph. 6:10-11

We are in a war but not against flesh and blood.

“Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.”Eph. 6:13

As you read a little further along in that chapter, you will learn that our armor consists of: the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the shoes of readiness and peace, the shield of faith, and the helmet of salvation. The final item on this list is the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God

It’s that last item that has the distinction of being an offensive weapon, and according to Hebrews 4:12, it’s a powerful one.

For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

We use that weapon when we pray the Word of God.

We can be confident in prayer when we know what the Bible says and speak it. Our troubling circumstance can be turned around and used to win the game for the glory of God through prayer.

We are more than conquerors because of the victory that has already won at Calvary.

▪   I pray Lord that my 6-year-old practices self-control (defense). I also pray that he will find favor in the eyes of his teacher because of his self-control and obedience. May the other students follow his lead by listening to the teacher, working when it’s time to work, and playing when it’s time to play (offense). (Psalm 5:12, Numbers 6:25–26)

▪   Father God, help my husband get up to speed with the knowledge he needs for his new job (defense).  I also pray that You would give him the wisdom and knowledge he needs to operate in his position successfully. Give him insight into efficiencies that will cause his department to flourish despite this down economy (offense). (Jeremiah 29:11, Jeremiah 33:3

▪   Dear Lord, I choose to forgive_____________________________ for ______________________(defense). Lord, bless them and their family. I pray that Your love would penetrate their heart and that they would understand the grace you have made available to them (offense). (Luke 6:8, Luke 6:27, Psalm 103:10-14)

We have the advantage, but it’s us to us to advance.

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Starting today, Circles of Faith will be hosting a Facebook Prayer community; a place where we can join together to share our prayer needs and testimonies of God’s provision. It is a forum for us to gather on-line and share what we are believing God for.

It’s there that we will knit our faith together and wield the Sword of the Spirit for His glory.

Head over there and see what is all about…

photo credit: One lucky guy via photopincc

Kids Need Rest Too

Before I learned how to rest regularly, I was a mess. As a mother of three with work and a family to juggle it seemed indulgent to rest or observe Sabbath. At the beginning of the week, I would write out my to-do list for work and home, then get busy Monday through Thursday crossing things off that list, and eventually crash hard on Friday. I was easily frustrated with myself, my kids, and my husband because I was burnt out.

When I incorporated a daily, weekly, and even monthly rhythm of rest into my life, things changed. I felt refreshed, recharged, and was able to invest in my work and my relationships.

Head over to Faith Gateway to read more about the benefits of rest and how it's just as important for our kids as it is for us.  

This Month: Learning What the Bible Says about Listening and Using Your Words

This month I am focusing on the topic of LISTENING with my children.

Some days I have to repeat myself several times before my kids hear me speak. I compete with iPads, cell phones, video games, and TV for their attention. So now those things are off limits in the mornings while we’re getting ready for the day and in the evenings before bedtime. The goal is to create a habit of mindfulness as well as quiet their minds enough to hear my voice but also God’s voice. 

With a little practice, they can become quick to hear, slow to speak (James 1:19). When they do speak, it would be best if it was with thoughtfulness and restraint (Proverbs 17:27). I want them to listen to advice and accept instruction so that in the future they will be wise people (Proverbs 19:20), primarily so they can avoid some of the mistakes I made. But most of all, I hope the words of their mouth and the meditation of their heart to be pleasing to God, their Heavenly Father who loves them (Proverbs 17:27).   

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The digital download of these cards is available in my Etsy Shop for only $0.99. If you prefer the convenience of receiving these cards professionally printed, trimmed, and delivered to your mailbox, you can purchase card sets HERE.